Trust

I'm a goal setting type person... clearly.

The problem with that is remembering that life isn't a race to check off all the "to-do's" on your list.

Life is a process. It changes. It has seasons. Sometimes you knock it out of the part and sometimes you fall on your face.

Both are okay. In fact, both are vital.

If not for my "failures" I wouldn't have the chance to work harder, test my mind and abilities, and show those around me that impossible means nothing when God is with you.

Those are the moments when I can give God all the credit and no one argues. The moments people are saying "I don't know how you do it!" I can say "God works all things for His good and glory for those who serve Him. He provides strength, energy, motivation and opportunity that this world can't."

No one argues.

They either agree or get quiet.

Either they're faith is contented and the glory of the Lord more firmed in their mind.

Or they're thinking. Because everything I said challenges what they believe and the stance they've taken on spiritual issues.

Do I think what I do is that amazing? Nope.

I think what I do is mundane, repetitive, "old school", rewarding and different than what most people are seeking. But more importantly, I think it's exactly where God wants me.

He has a plan for my good and His glory (anyone else start singing?) and it's my job to trust that His plans are better than mine.

3 years ago my plans involved living happily-ever-after, babies, a dog, buying a house and selling knit and crochet items in my free time.

Now... well, now looks very different......

There is no happily-ever-after. The divorce process has started.

My baby is 2! What? How is he 2? I've been in denial.

A dog sounds like a lot of useless work. If my kids want a pet, they can have a hermit crab or claim a chicken!

I did buy a house... but it's not at all what had been in my plan. I can see my neighbors (many of them!) and I don't even have 1 acre, let alone the 6+ I dreamed of.

And what the heck is free time? There's bible time, church time, kid time, critter time, cleaning time, school time, volunteer time, fellowship time, work time and sometimes I even have sleep time! None of my time is free... its all been delegated to a useful purpose.

For me it marks a huge point of growth to say "I had this plan, it went ABC. But God's plan is different than mine, and I'm going to trust Him. He made me, so He knows what's best for me."

I'm still going to keep prayerfully  making plans, but hopefully I never again dig my heels in the sand like a stubborn fool because God didn't follow my plan.

I'm going to do my best to trust the Lord with all my heart, soul and might. That's part of loving Him, we trust those we love.